Three long weeks

Thanksgiving is coming up soon, but I don’t know if it will be soon enough.

With as hectic as work has been lately and as many hours as I’ve been getting, I’m becoming increasingly mentally drained. I can’t write. I don’t want to read or sew or draw or, well, do anything. I just want everything to stop.

No, not stop permanently. Just stop long enough for me to recharge. Regain my footing. Keep from losing my ever-loving mind.

I have a couple of tentative half days coming up before Thanksgiving, but I worry that they won’t be enough. There’s always something that needs to be done…and because of that, my brain is trying to shut down. Or at least part of it is. The emotional part. Well, the happy emotional part.

I can’t wait for those four and a half days where nothing is required of me other than to show up and hang out with family.

Three weeks. Three long weeks.

Feed me, Seymour!

Got the first feedback of my finished and published novel today. The reader loved it! She’s going to post a positive review on Amazon and also write up a review for the website we work for.

This is what I wrote it for. This. To get feedback from readers, to hear that people loved reading what I wrote. This is what the last year to year and a half has been about.

Yeah, I know it’s one person. I know it’s only one sale. But for someone who wasn’t sure if she could get even that much, it’s a huge step. I’m beyond ecstatic. I did it. I really did it.

Now, on to the next one!

Productive procrastination

Today I spent a lot of time meeting and then exceeding my #NaNoWriMo word count for the day. I spent exponentially  more time finding other things to do.

They weren’t all useless things. I did several different Cosplay Closet Essentials interviews, so I’m good pretty much through the new year on those. Just have to compile the questions/answers into a file and then copy/paste to #TalkNerdyWithUs when it’s time for a new post. Met some interesting new people (well, met them online–not in person) and learned a lot.

Then I thought, “Y’know what? I need to work on my own cosplay page. It’s high time I picked a name for myself and spruced up the page.” So I did. Spent a few hours adding photos, organizing photo albums, and changing the name/web link/info. (FYI, the link is ). It’s not perfect, but then again neither am I. So there.

I also started cutting out pattern pieces for some Christmas presents I’m making. Because that is totally conducive to achieving my goal of getting 50k words written by the end of the month.

I’ll get there. Eventually. I have a couple of half days at work this month, in addition to the fact that my husband will be working late shifts for most of the month. I should have plenty of time.

Provided I can limit the distractions.

That’s one less on the bucket list…

Well, I did it. I conquered my fear of publishing–in a manner of speaking.

I’m still terrified of submitting to editors/agents/publishers, but I have one thing now I can say with pride: I have published a novel. I did it, from start to finish (with a lot of help from a lot of great people–but if you want to know about that, you’ll have to buy the book and read the acknowledgements!).

My writing goal for the year had been to finish the first draft. I blew that goal out of the water in April, and now I have a completed novel online. Amazing how that works. I’ve even started another one (possibly set in the same universe? Haven’t decided that one yet) that I’m going to expand upon during November’s #NaNoWriMo–which starts in a couple of hours for me.

Here is the link to Whispers of Death:

Now, I’m not going to pressure anyone into buying it. I mean, sure, it’s getting to be the holiday season. Christmas is right around the corner. And I’m sure everyone knows somebody who’s into occult/supernatural or urban fantasy fiction.

should be getting some sleep right now, but I’m totally amped about my new publication. Oh, well. It’s not like I sleep a lot as it is 😉

To the Sky

In honor of All Hallow’s Eve, I’m going to post a poem from my book Kamikaze Butterflies entitled “To the Sky.” Happy Halloween, and enjoy!

To the Sky

As we’re born, then so we die;

Sky to Earth, Earth to Sky.

They watch us well, the Lord and Lady

Through summer bright and winter shady.

But time then comes for us to leave

And for our hearts our friends to grieve.

Though thoughts of dead bring pain so deep,

Our memories we hold and keep.

Of times of happiness and regret

And things that haven’t happened yet.

Of chances missed to say good-bye;

All these cause tear-swell in our eye.

But remember this and take good care—

The dead surround you, everywhere.

Fragile bodies die so swift

But this one thought can you uplift:

The Spirit’s everlasting life

Will comfort you in times of strife.

No one ever truly dies.

We simply go back to the Sky.

Lullaby and Good-Day

These early mornings are killing me. A Ritalin, more than half a liter of Soda Stream energy drink, and a cup of coffee (that’s right, I resorted to coffee–which I hate) and I’m still sleepy. I even managed to go back to sleep after my initial early a.m. kitteh-in-my-face wake up call.

If they keep up, it will help with my NaNoWriMo next month. I can type in the morning (imagine the crazy things I’ll write at nothing in the morning!) and again in the evening while my husband is in training for work, so I can hopefully get the word count in every day. 1667 words in a day doesn’t sound like much, but as any author knows there are some days when the words just don’t come.

As a “pantser” (someone who doesn’t really outline but instead just writes by the seat of their pants), I honestly don’t really much know where my story’s going. It’s just going…somewhere. I kind of have a general idea of where it’s going to end up, but I’m not certain. Oh, and I have no clue on the middle. That’s just up in the air. So there’s that.

Some people don’t go for that kind of writing, but it actually helped in my first novel. I had an entire chapter that was completely unplanned, but the character decided to show up at the end of the chapter before to “save the day.” I had no clue he was going to do that, but as I was finishing the book he just showed up and it was one of those light bulb moments where I was like “Of course, this is how this part is going to resolve! It makes perfect sense now.”

But now it’s off to get ready for the day job. Adios.

Frozen in Fear

Querying. For some authors, the bane of their writing careers.

Or maybe that’s just me.

I can’t stress how much I want my first novel to be published by a publishing house rather than on Kindle and/or Createspace. I want it out there. I want it on bookshelves. I want people to buy it and read it and review it and beg for more. Of course I want these things; I’m a narcissist at heart. I want all the credit.

This morning I tried Googling informational blogs and articles on the query process. First let me tell you, an 8 point font at three in the morning is not conducive to learning. I’m good to be seeing single at that time, let alone being able to read smaller print. The synopsis was fairly easy to understand, but when I can’t even read the articles it’s harder to pick up.

Another hindrance to beginning the query process is my sheer terror of querying. It’s irrational, but then again panic attacks are not always rational.

Researching agents is another thing that is holding me back. As with the query letters, I find the task daunting and intimidating. Do I possibly have more of a fear of rejection than I thought I did? I’m well aware that it comes with the territory of writing; you write, you submit, and you wait for the dreaded rejection letter or email. I thought I was past the point of caring about that. I mean, it happens. There’s no avoiding it, so why worry? But, as my psychiatrist pointed out, if I’m not worried about rejection then why am I so apprehensive about sending my work out?

I guess I have to push past this, just like I pushed past my fear of making a corset. It must get done, so it will.


Work of Art Wednesday

It’s time for another Work of Art Wednesday! Once again, I’m going to share a photo of a work of art of mine that is available for sale. As always, you can comment here or message me on one of the social media sites where this posts if you are interested. First come, first serve. 🙂


I call this piece “Old before Her Time.” 11″ x 14″ canvas paper.

From the Bottom of His Heart

He loves me so much, never wanting to be separated

He loves game so much, never wanting to stop

He loves his TV shows so much, never wanting to miss an episode

Some call him nerd or geek

But he is so much more than that

He is a lover, through and through

He loves the things he loves with all of his heart

He loves completely

He loves purely

He loves passionately

There are few who ever achieve this level of love

Total devotion

To all that he holds dear