I’m not gonna lie. I have an Amazon wishlist full of stuff that I want for Christmas this year. Not that I expect to get all of the stuff I want–but I figured it doesn’t hurt to have a selection of stuff for people to choose from, should they opt to get me a gift.
What I really want, though, can’t be bought and can’t always be given. I want inspiration. I want that writer’s block for Book 3 to just be blown wide open so I can continue and finish the damn first draft. I want those things, but no one can purchase those for me, and no one can really give something that specific, anyway.
It doesn’t feel like the Christmas season. I’ve got the tree up, I’ve signed up for the Baronial Yule event and the work holiday party, I’ve started kinda trying to think up ideas for what to get who…but I just can’t get into the spirit this year. It doesn’t feel like Christmastime. It feels like Just Another Day. And that’s kinda sad.
Now, anyone who really knows me knows that I’m not Christian, but that’s not why Christmas means something to me. I don’t put up the tree for pagan reasons, either, but bear with me. I celebrate the spirit of giving gifts to loved ones to show your appreciation of them. That’s a pretty good reason to celebrate, right? And yeah, it doesn’t have to be on a certain day of year, but since the majority of the people I know are celebrating on this day, then hell, I might as well celebrate with them–even if I’m not celebrating the historically-inaccurate birthday of a Christian holy figure.
I feel like I should maybe try to get in the spirit of things this year. Try to fake it, even if I can’t make it. Or something.
Maybe I’ll write up a sweet Christmas-themed story to post on Christmas day. Or maybe I’ll actually get my butt in gear when it comes to the holiday shopping. Or maybe…maybe I’ll just be a Grinch this year.
I wish I could get more in the spirit of things. Get my head in “the zone.” But wishes don’t always come true, sadly.
This weekend is an “off” weekend, for the most part; maybe I can catch up to the holidays then. Get some gifts purchased and possibly wrapped, that kind of thing. If not, well…
…There’s always next year, I guess.