Okay, so I wasn’t really hallucinating…but isn’t that was dreaming is, after all?
I get the strangest dreams sometimes. And it’s not that they’re bad, but they’re so vivid that my mind & body reject being asleep. I’m forced awake by my own body so I don’t have to dream anymore.
The feeling is kind of freaky. I dig my way out of the dream and back to consciousness, and no matter how tired I am I fight going back to sleep. I’m not wide awake by any stretch of the imagination; I just can’t stand the thought of dreaming again.
Right now, for instance, I’m exhausted. I want to go back to sleep, but at the same time I don’t. I don’t want to go back down the rabbit hole. Into the Twilight Zone. Fuck it, Narnia or wherever the hell you go when you’re dreaming. I don’t want to do it. Nope. No siree Bob.
Now let’s see if the Ritalin and energy drink can help me face the day ahead now that I’ve wakened ahead of time.